


Operation Gentle Touch

by teamcap4bucky



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-07 05:57:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16848442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teamcap4bucky/pseuds/teamcap4bucky
Summary: Bucky thinks his arm is a complete menace, but all of his friends are there to prove him wrong.This is a work in progress.





	1. Chapter 1

Bucky Barnes, on occasion, was a whiny little bitch. Yes, I am aware of how harsh that sounds, but listen, sometimes the truth hurts. Don’t get me wrong, I love the guy, and we get along great, but sometimes the “woe is me” shit gets on everyone’s nerves. 

Y/N and Bucky are best friends. They are inseparable. They get along so well, that from the minute they met each other, they knew they would have a lifetime friendship, and more to be honest. She had helped Steve search for him, helped him with his recovery, and helped integrate him back into the world. They drove Steve crazy. They were thick as thieves, two peas in a pod. They laugh and tell people that they’re like Peanut Butter and Jelly, and Steve is their Wonder Bread. 

Two years ago, Tony had to upgrade the bedrooms in the compound, adding more security there after they had started receiving Hydra threats. Everybody had to double bunk for a while while his or her rooms were being fixed. Y/N and Bucky never went back to their own rooms. They loved the dynamic between them, and they loved living together, so they just stayed that way. Tony ended up knocking out the wall in between their rooms, and made it onto a small apartment for them. Everyone agreed that they had some kind of freaky soul mate thing going on, but neither of them ever acted on it. That was the only thing about you two that completely baffled everyone there. They didn’t understand why neither of you ever made the move, when it was so blatantly obvious that you two were made for each other. No man, or women alive would ever compare to the to the other one. It just wasn’t possible. Y/N knew, it, and Bucky knew it. Y/N was completely head over heals in love with Bucky, and he the same for her. They both knew that the other one was aware of it, as did their friends, there were no secrets there. Anytime your team mates tried to get one of you to meet someone, or set you up on a date, you would say no, you were fine. Bucky would always tell the guys that he was seeing someone, and you would tell the girls that you already had a man. This infuriated everyone, because upon asking whom these mystery people were, you would flat out answer the question with the other ones names, or point at the other one in the room. Then you would both laugh, especially if you were in the same room with each other while they were asking. Bucky would always send a wink your way when you pointed to him. You would always smile and blush when he nodded at you. In Y/N and Bucky’s eyes, and hearts, they were together, heart and soul. They just weren’t…actually together. 

“Y/N/N!” Bucky yelled from the shower. “We need a new handle in the shower again!”

“Alright, I’ll let Tony know!” Y/N headed towards the bathroom. “Are you okay, was it a bad one?” She knew he had a rough night. She could hear him across the hall, tossing and turning, but by the time she had checked on him, he had fallen back asleep.

“Yea, I’m fine, I- I guess I was just more wound up then I thought when I got in here.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it, Buck. Just use the other shower until we get this fixed.” Y/N glanced into the shower to see if there was any new damage to the tiles, but this time thankfully, just the handle had been ripped out.

“Sorry, doll.” Bucky handed her the knob, sighing as he closed the glass door. 

“It’s okay Bucky, and I’m sorry too, for looking at your ass when you turned around.” She smirked while walking away.

“No you’re not!” Bucky yelled at her while she headed to the kitchen.

“You’re right, I’m not!” She chuckled back.

Twenty minutes later, He emerged from the shower, looking like someone who had just lost his or her favorite stuffed animal.

“What’s up Bucky Bear? Why the sad face?” You knew why, because you had had this conversation a million times before, but he needed to get it out, and you were always there to let him.

“Nothing.” He said, shaking his head back and forth, sitting on the edge of the bed next to you.

“Okay. Hey, umm, can I ask you something Bucky?” He looked up at you waiting for you to continue. “How long do you want me to wait before I call you out on your bullshit? I mean, I have like three loads to fold, so you have time to make some shit up if you need to. Unless you want to man up, and just tell me so we can talk about it now.”

There was no use in trying to get anything by you. She could read him like a book. She mine as well have been the author of it.

“I feel like my arm is such a nuisance sometimes. I’ve had it for how long now? You would think I would have it under control, but…l don’t know. I know you think it is amazing and all, but I swear, if I had the choice…”

“Don’t.” He looked at her, and knew better than to continue, knowing she would shut him down in an instant. All she had to do was raise her eyebrows, and give him ‘the look,’ and he knew he was already losing that argument.

He threw himself backwards onto the bed, and sighed, with his arms over his face. 

“Get up, go get dressed, stop the pity party. I won’t have it, and neither will Steve if he hears it. You know how I feel about it, and you know how I feel about you, and I will not let you sit here and do this to yourself.” He sat up and looked at you, faking a smile, but he knew, that you knew it was just so you wouldn’t continue to reprimand him. You looked at him with a straight face, and tapped his nose with your finger.

“Boop. There’s my real smile. Go, get dressed.” She pulled him to a standing position, and pushed him away towards his room.

Bucky started to giggle, and without looking back, spoke over his shoulder. “Alight, I’m going…but listen, in all seriousness though, stop looking at my ass, it’s making me uncomfortable, doll.”

“I wasn’t looking at…Bucky!!” Y/N turned around to see Bucky dropping his towel on the floor as he turned the corner of the hallway. She covered her eyes and laughed, but not before taking another quick peek. I mean, friend, or not, that man has a great ass.

Two hours later, Y/N walked into the kitchen, and called everyone to attention. Steve, Wanda, Clint, Sam, and Nat were all sitting down to lunch around the table.

“We have a situation folks. ‘Bucky is on his ‘meriod’ again, and I have to fix this once and for all.” You were serious, and they were a bit concerned wondering what had happened since you two had left after breakfast.

“What’s a… meriod?” Steve questioned, scrunching his face in confusion.

“It’s a man period.” You stated

“Wait, what? A man…what? I’m…this isn’t a real thing right?” Nat chuckled at Steve, while Wanda explained.

“No, it’s not real. He gets mood swings once or twice a month like we do before…” The boys in the room cut off Wanda.

“He’s being pissy, and whining about something, Steve. What is it now?” Sam sat down at the counter, interested in what was going on.

“It’s his arm…” Before you could even finish the rest of your sentence, there was moaning, and eye rolls from the group.

“Again?” Steve moaned. “He was doing so well, what happened?

“Broken shower handle. I know, it’s not even worth getting mad over, but he is. That’s why I need your help.” You looked around the room hoping they would hear you out, and help you on your newest mission.

“Of course, Y/N, what do you need?” Clint joined Sam and you at the counter.

“I am going to show him that his arm is perfect, and that it’s not as horrible as his believes it to be. He thinks it’s just a weapon, and it’s only meant to cause destruction, and devastation, but I know better. I know him, and the only way to make him believe that it isn’t a threat is to trick his stubborn ass into believing it. Therefore, I have a mission for you all, should you choose to accept it. I’m going to refer to it as “Operation Gentle Touch”, OTG for short, or as I like to call it, the “Prove to Bucky that his arm’s not a dick” mission.” Everyone chuckled at the name, but they all agreed to help. “Let’s face it guys, it’s one of the main reasons that we aren’t together. He would never admit it to me, but I know that’s part of it. He thinks he’ll hurt me. We all know he won’t, but if this helps convince him otherwise, I’m willing to try. What do you guys think?”

“I’m in, I think we all are, right?” Wanda looked around the room as everyone nodded in agreement. 

“I’d give him one of my arms if he would stop being all broody all the time, so I am definitely in.” Sam was dead serious. He was over the mopey attitudes.

“So, Y/N, what do you need us to do? “ Nat loved a challenge.


	2. Chapter 2

Over the next few weeks, the team was thinking of little ways to get Bucky to use his arm in the most delicate way possible, without him knowing what they were doing.

The first mission was a success…mostly, and I say mostly because at one point, I thought he was going to have a slight panic attack, but he ended up pulling it together. 

Scott had come by with Cassie for a visit to see everyone. She loved coming to the compound to see all of her “aunts and uncles.” They loved seeing her just as much. She was always asking them to show her their “special talents,” and skills. She loved taking very low flights around the backyard with Sam, and Wanda always makes her laugh when she does silly things with her energy mists. Tony would let her fly mini robots around the room, and Thor, if he happened to be in town, would spark her finger a little bit so she could go around shocking everyone when they weren’t looking. To be honest, he was probably one of her favorites. To be extra honest, he ranked pretty low among the team while this activity played out. This visit, however, was a little bit different, as she had brought a “friend,” or rather a school project with her. 

“Hey Cass! I missed you!” Y/N grabbed her up, spinning her in a huge hug. “What do you have there?”

“It’s my egg baby! It’s a project for my class. We’re learning about nature, and animals in science. We went out looking for all kinds of cool thing in the woods. We learned about being gentle with plants and flowers, and how to walk carefully, and look out for animals and little bugs when we’re outside.”

“Wow, that sounds really neat! So, what do you have to do with your egg baby?” You inquired.

“I have to keep it safe, and take care of it. It has to stay warm, it needs to be rocked if it wakes up, and keep it needs to be clean. I have to take it out sometimes to hold it, and change it’s little egg clothes.” She started laughing as she finished the sentence. “We had to name it too! Mine is a boy, his name is Benedict!”

I had started laughing at the eggs name, and her story in general, when Scott caught my attention. “I was thinking that Benedict here might be good for your little side mission with Buckaroo, right? Maybe we can get him to “babysit” for a few hours?” 

“Oh my eggs, you’re amazing! Yes! That is a great idea!” You know just what to do.

“Is that a Cassie I see?” Bucky ran into the room when he saw the little ponytail peaking up over the couch.

“Uncle Bucky Bear!” She ran over to him and jumped in his arms. “Throw me to the moon!” She loved when Bucky was around. He used to toss her way high up in the air, much to Scott’s dismay, but he knew she would never fall, so he let it happen.

“How’s my Cassadoodle? I haven’t seen you in forever, what’s new?” Bucky set her back down on the couch.

She reached over and grabbed her basket containing a one Mr. Benedict. “Look at my egg baby! I’m taking care of him for science class. Everyone got an egg to keep for a week, and we have to keep it safe, and not let it break.”

“An egg huh? How do you take care of it?” Bucky listened as Cassie went on about all the egg duties that she was required to perform. He laughed a few times, and equally enjoyed the name she had picked for her baby egg. It wasn’t until she delivered the last line of her speech to him, that he started to panic.

“I’m what?!” Bucky, wide eyed, shaking his hands and head at you while you explained that he was going to have to ‘”egg sit” for them while you went to the store. Cassie had a father –daughter dance coming up, and Scott needed help with dresses. 

“This seems like a bad idea. Can Wanda or Nat do it?” 

“You’re the only one here, everyone else it out. Besides, its super easy, and you only have to take it out of the basket a few times to rock it, or change it.” You were internally screaming at this point, trying not to laugh, but this had to be done. “Look, there is a blanket, clothes, and a little temp monitor in the basket. I’ll leave instructions for you on what to do. She cupped his jaw and spoke softly. “You can do this Buck, it’s an egg.” 

“What if I break it? It’ll kill me if she gets upset.” He looked at you and saw “the look.” “I’m not the most light handed person, babe, I don’t know if this is such a good idea.”

“Yes, you are, and you will be fine. You got this!” You handed him the instruction manual for the egg baby, and turned to leave giving Scott a hidden thumbs up.

Bucky took a deep breath and took the basket over to the couch. He turned on the news, and instantly regretted it, as there were a bunch of stories regarding the recent robberies around town. They still hadn’t caught the guy, and the crime scenes seemed to be getting closer to their area. He let out a frustrated sigh, and swore he was going to look for the guy himself if he had too. He could feel himself starting to get worked up as they discussed politics and overseas issues. Just when he was about to change the channel to give his brain some relief, he heard Benedicts timer go off. 

“Crap.” Sighing he looked over at the colored egg nestled in his little basket. He grabbed the care guide that you had left for him, and started at the top of the list.

1\. Make sure he is warm. Use the thermometer to take his temp. If he is cold, snuggle him in his blanket.

2\. Is he hungry? When was the last time he ate? Offer him a small snack. 

3\. Does he need his bedding changed? Even eggs have accidents.

4\. Is he cranky? Try rocking him back to sleep. 

**Benedict has a sensor inside of him, and he will chirp when you have completed the correct task. ** Good luck!

“Okay, sounds easy enough. Step one, pick up egg, step two, hope you don’t break it, step three, watch the egg explode everywhere, step four, clean up yolk massacre, and finally, hug Cassie so she stops crying when she sees that you have annihilated her baby. ” He inhaled deeply, and reached slowly into the small basket. “Please don’t break, please don’t break, please don’t break.” He kept repeating it like a mantra, until the egg was in his lap. 

“Okay, little egg, what do you need from me?” Picking up the tiny forehead thermometer, he placed it gently on Benedict’s round head. He had started to feel a little irked when the gauge kept slipping down on Benedicts “face.” If he held it with his left hand, it would slip or get caught in his plates. His right hand was good, but that risked his left hand squeezing to hard, and smashing it. He placed Bennie’s blanket over his left hand and gently laid him back on it. 

“There we go! Okay, so no chirping, which means you’re still probably uncomfortable. Well, that makes two of us I guess. Let’s try rocking you.” He lightly swayed his hand back and forth. All of a sudden he felt a slight vibration. “Whoa, is that it, you need to be rocked?” He continued to move his hand back and forth. Things were going well. He was starting to feel a bit better, and a little bit more confident at this point. “We may be alright here, Bennie.”

“Ughhh, what are you doing Bucky?” He jumped at the sound of Clint’s voice behind him. He turned to him; ears rose colored, and started mumbling.

“Hey Clint… what’s going on?”

Clint chucked a little, while pointing to the egg in Bucky’s hand. “You tell me! What have you got going on there?”

“Oh, umm, this is Benedict, I’m…egg sitting? Bucky couldn’t even believe the words coming from his own mouth.

“You’re egg sitting?” Clint repeated him to make sure he was hearing correctly.

“Yes.”

“An egg?”

“Yea.”

“Were you just rocking it?”

“Yes?” Bucky's scrunched his face up, even questioning himself at that point, knowing that this looked crazy.

“Huh.” Clint just nodded his head, trying to take in what was happening in front of him. “Buck, do you need me to call someone for you?”

“What? No! I don’t… I’m not having an episode, it’s for Cassie! It’s her school project. She’s learning about nature, and she has an egg to take care of. She’s out buying a dress for some dance with Y/N and Scott; so Y/N asked if I would baby...or…egg sit. It needs like changing, and feedings and stuff. You know how it is, you have kids.”

“Yeah, I have kids, not eggs. Hawkeye is just a name, you know that right? I don’t actually live in a nest.” He smiled at Bucky, but then was distracted by a small sound coming from Bucky’s hand.

Bucky gasped and looked at his hand. He hadn’t realized that he had still been rocking the egg while conversing with Clint.

“YES!” He raised his right fist in the air. “I got this! Stick with me Bennie, you’re gonna be alright.” Bucky stopped and stared at the wall for a second. “The minute I talked to him was when it got weird right?”

“It got weird the moment I walked into the room and saw…well…pretty much everything in front of me.” Clint waived his hand around at Bucky and the basket. “On that note, I’m going to train. Good luck with…this…or, him…it? I don’t…I don’t know.

“Later.” Bucky laid back on the couch feeling proud of himself. He continued to master "egg parenting" over the next two hours, occasionally sending pics of Bennie to Cassie, so she knew he was okay.

Bucky was just about to fall asleep on the couch when he heard the elevator ding. Out ran Cassie, and Scott and Y/N weren’t far behind. You stopped dead in your tracks when you heard Cassie gasp, then yell. Oh my shit, what happened? Did Bucky drop it? Is it broken? Was this whole plan about to blow up in your face? You grabbed on to Scott’s arm not wanting to look in the living room, for fear of what could have gone wrong. He had just texted you not thirty minutes with a good progress report.

“Uncle Bucky, what did you do?” Cassie yelled out into the open room, her small voice echoing through the kitchen.

You closed your eyes, and prayed that the egg was still intact.

“Do you like it?” Bucky looked at Cassie, hoping he didn’t screw up.

“I love it!” Cassie squealed out and threw her arms around his neck.

“I figured, hey, if you’re going to grow up in this family, you need an outfit right? You can’t exactly go save the world in your pajamas!” Bucky grinned at her, choking back a laugh.

“He looks just like you!” She giggled and picked Bennie up, running off to show Scott what she had found to be so funny.

You walked over to the couch and plopped next to Bucky.  
“What did you do?”

Cassie came running over to you both. “Look Aunt Y/N. Bennie has a metal arm just like Uncle Bucky!”

Looking down, you couldn’t believe your eyes. Bucky had not only taken amazing care of Bennie, but he had fashioned a metal arm out of foil from the kitchen, and placed it on the left side of the egg. He had even managed to get black material from an old shirt, and made it a jacket that looked just like his tactical gear. You slapped your hand over your mouth, but couldn’t help the laughter that came from within.

“Bucky! That is the most amazing thing I have ever seen!”

“You like it, doll?” He was blushing at this point, but was psyched that Cassie had liked it so much.

“I love it. You did a great job today, Buck.” You ran your fingers through his hair, and he settled his head down in your lap.

“Thanks, doll.” He leaned up and planted a chaste kiss on your nose. “It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I’m glad it’s over though. Parenting is exhausting, I need a nap.”

You both chuckled, and shortly after, you could hear his small snores from your lap. 

Mission status: Success


	3. Chapter 3

The sound of your bones shattering was heard throughout the entire room as the door you were currently wedged in was slammed repeatedly into your hand. You kicked your legs to get free, but the grip on your throat, and the two hundred pounds of angry meat on you was making it hard to escape. You manage to get your other hand free, grabbing at the dagger in your boot, fiercely wedging it in between his rib cage, praying that you would hit a major organ. He screams out, his anger multiplying, your face turning blue as he squeezes your windpipe just a bit more. The tears run down your face, the pressure almost too much to bare. You close your eyes and start to thrash in one final attempt to shift your weight from underneath him. You open your eyes, as you hear the man scream, twitching as you twist the serrated edge of your dagger into his back. You flinch, ducking your head as you see a bright flash of color whip by you, sending shards of wood and blood splatter into your face. 

Gross. Come on dude, die already.

You smirk at him, knowing that your help is coming. He watches your expression change, which flares his temper. In one final attempt to hurt you, he grabs your suit, and begins to violently slam your head into the floor, over and over again, until he can see you start to sway and lose consciousness. Just before you black out, you feel a bit of relief on your chest, suddenly being able to fully breath without restrictions. You moan out as the pins and needles attack your lower extremities, blood desperately trying to return to your limbs.

Lifting your head off the floor, you try to focus your vision on the sudden quietness in the room.

“Did you kill him?” You attempt to speak, but your voice is harsh and weak from the choking.

Steve leans over, shaking his head at you with only half of a smile, panting. “No, I didn’t.”

“Damn you and your stupid moral compass.” You rub the back of your head, noting the blood stained gloves your now wearing. 

“It’s not that. He was dead when I got to you.” He looks up over your head, smiling at a body you had yet to visualize. You grin when you see a pair of red goggles, upside down, smiling back at you. 

“I shot him.” He winks down at you, so proud of himself for being your hero.

“That’s my boy, Sammy, up top.” You lift your hand up for him to high five you. “OWWWW! What the fuck, Sam, why would you hit my hand? He just broke all of my fingers, you dumb shit!” You drop your head onto the floor, moaning in pain.

“That’s the hand you gave me, woman!” He yells back, trying to attempt to help you up off the floor with Steve. “Why would you offer me a busted up hand to begin with?”

“Because I’m concussed! I don’t know what I’m doing!”

“Alright, guys, quiet down.” Steve manages to take back control of the scene before pressing his finger to his comm. “I think we’re good here, meet us at rendezvous in 3 minutes. You good to walk?”

“Yeah, I’m good.” You swerve a little when you stand up, but he holds you until you regain your balance.  
“Don’t let Sam hurt me again.”   
“Mm mm mm.” Sam says, shaking his head at you. “Not even a thank you.” He turns to scan the area outside of the door, making sure you were all clear. From five feet behind him, you can hear him having a conversation with himself. “Hey Sam, thanks for taking that guy off my hands for me. Oh sure, no problem Y/N, my pleasure. I would have died if you hadn’t have shot him. That’s what I’m here for, you know, just making sure you and Captain Amerifuck don’t die. I love getting shot at for you two, I wish we could have missions everyday. Did I mention how handsome you look with your new wings? No, you didn’t, but thanks for noticing.”

“I would never say that!” You yell forward, Steve chuckling a little bit.

“Just let him have his moment, Y/N.”

The three of you get on to the Quin, where Bruce begins to look over your wounds. Steve heads to the front of the jet, setting the coordinates for home.

“How are you feeling?’ Bruce shines a light in your eyes assessing your pupils.

“My head feels like you punched it, and I’m a bit dizzy. I kind of want to throw up, and I would really love for you to take that light out of my eyes.” 

“You have a concussion Y/N/N. I need you stay awake for the next 12 hours, at least. I can give you some pain meds, but I want you off of your feet for the rest of the day. I’ll check on you tonight before bed, and tomorrow morning. I’ll let Bucky know what happened. He’s going to have to help you tonight. It looks like you have four broken fingers. I’m going to wrap them for now, but I’ll have to set them when we get back.”

“That doesn’t sound fun. Will it feel worse than what it felt like when he was breaking them?” You wait for his response, but not liking the scrunched up face he gives you. “If you weren’t so nice, I swear…”

“I know. “ Bruce starts to wrap them as you bite down on your lip.

Sam heads to the passenger seat and watches the skyline.

“You know…he’s not going to be happy that you brought her back broken.” A sinister grin takes over his face, knowing that Steve was going to get so much grief later.

“Every mission has the potential for someone to get hurt. He knows that, he’ll understand.” He exhales, dropping his head into the seat, trying to remain calm, knowing he’ll have to explain what happened to Bucky.

“Will he?” Sam glances at Steve, asking what he already knew the answer to.  
“No, of course not, he’s going to kill me. I’m already sweating.” He drops his face into both hands, fearing what his arrival home would bring.   
“Can I watch you tell him?” Sam leans back into the seat, throwing his feet up on the dash, laughing as Steve rides out his wave of emotions. 

The hangar door slowly opens letting Bucky see you an inch at time. His jaw slowly imitates the hanger door, dropping slowly as he watches Bruce walk you down the ramp towards him.

“Aww, doll, what did they do to you?” He places his hand on your temple, caressing the side of your face, looking over the cuts and bruises that you had been given. He cups your cheeks, gently pulling your forehead to his lips. 

“I’m alright. It looks worse than it actually is.”

“It looks like someone with large hands tried to choke you to death.” He says, while examining the large bruises in the shapes of fingers around the base of your neck.

“Oh, well then it looks pretty accurate then.” You touch his face, rubbing his cheek with your thumb. You don’t want him to worry, but if it roles were reversed, you would be the same way right now.

He pulls you in tighter, breathing in every part of you. Bucky was your home, your safe place, No matter what you went through out in the field, he could make it disappear with one hug. Somehow, he could make all of the killing, the pain, and the destruction fade from your mind. 

“You okay?” He mumbles into your hair, still taking you in, thankful for you being home.

“A little painful, but okay.” 

“How about up here?” He asks pointing to your head. He knows that after missions, you sometimes need a little bit of time for your brain to calm down. Sometimes you just need to sit in a quiet room, or scream it out in the gym. Sometimes your body is so exhausted, but your brain doesn’t care, it wants to keep rewinding the movie over and over again, until you brake. 

“Mentally, just tired, but physically…Bruce said I have a concussion.”

He looks at Bruce for confirmation.

“I’m going to need her in medbay soon. I have to set her fingers. Run some imaging on her head. Bring her down in a few minutes okay?” He nods at the both of you before heading down to the elevators.

“What happened?”

“Steve and Sam let a big guy beat me up”

“Where are they?” He looks over your shoulder into the jet. “Why haven’t they come out yet?”

“They’re scared of you.” You grin at that, knowing that they were both terrified of Bucky, especially when it came to your safety.

“They should be. The guy that did this…?”

“Taken care of.” You smile up at him.

“Steve?” He questions.

“Sam.”

“No shit? Hmm. Okay, baby. Go with Bruce. I’ll go make sure they’re okay.”

‘Be nice. It wasn’t their fault.’” You tilt your head to look into his beautiful crystal blue eyes. 

“I will, promise.” 

“I’m glad you’re okay.” He looks down at you, holding you in his arms, with no intentions of letting you go.

He smiles into your lips, giving you just the whisper of a kiss, but lightly pulling back when you both hear the metal of the hangar door being lifted.

“That’s a smart move, Rogers!” He yells out.

“Go.” He jumps up onto the door, throwing his body into a roll, before stalking towards the front of the cockpit. You see Sam slink out of the side from the front window.

“Hey, I killed the guy, I get a free pass today.”

Sam wraps his arm around your back, supporting you, still being a bit ataxic from your head trauma.

“Come on, I’ll take you to down.” 

You place a kiss on his cheek and hug him. “Thanks Sammy.” 

Bucky and Steve had finally made it down to medical, making sure they had a clear understanding of Bruce’s discharge orders for you. Bruce passes Steve your chart, making him sign your records, making sure that you understood everything for insurance purposes, being that you couldn’t due to your finger mishap.

Bucky watches the two of you, shaking his head in disapproval, making you both stop and question the motives behind the look.  
“What?” You say together.  
“You two had one job.” 

Yesterday morning…

Bucky stood in front of you and Steve, looking over your tactical suits, making sure that all of your weapons were in place, and that you guys were clear on the assignment details.

“Yes, dad, my guns were all cleaned yesterday, and loaded correctly. I have back up clips, and knives just in case.” You roll your eyes, shaking your head, but loving the fact that he always made sure you were safe before leaving on details.

“What…no weapons check for me?” Bucky raises his eyebrows at Steve, not wanting to hear his bullshit, to worried about the both of you to really laugh at this time. “I didn’t hear you once ask me if my shield had been polished. Where is my helmet? Who knows, maybe I forgot to bring it…”

Bucky crosses his arms, glaring at Steve in a ‘Don’t test me right now’ type of face.

Steve looks at you and smirks. He loves to get Bucky riled up. 

“Don’t smirk at me, that’s what you sound like when him and I go off on missions. It’s annoying, isn’t it?”

Bucky releases a deep sigh, rubbing his forehead, before he holds his hand up to you both.

“Let’s go over the rules.” He looks at you both while holding up a finger for each item he lists to you.

1\. “Use your heads. Not just as a weapon, but actually think with them.”  
2\. “Don’t bite off more than you can chew…or kill.”  
3\. “Watch her six, you watch his.” He waves his finger in between you two.  
4\. “If it looks like a setup, it is, get out.”  
5\. “If it was to easy, it’s wrong.”  
6\. “Communication…always.”  
7\. “Don’t be stupid.” He looks at you, and you squint back at him, almost offended that he would ever…but purse your lips because you know you do stupid shit sometimes.  
8\. “Don’t let Steve be stupid. You know what I’m talking about.”  
9\. “Don’t get cocky.” He glares at Steve once more, making you giggle a little. “That goes for you, too.”  
10\. “Last but not least, get in, get out, get home in one piece.”

“Am I clear?” He folds his arms once more, and scans you both, waiting for either of you to come back at him with a sarcastic comment.

“Yes, sir.” You both say

“Can I get on the jet now?” Steve smiles, waiting for Bucky to breath out. Bucky reaches out for a hug, and pulls him in. 

“Be careful, punk. Watch my girl, okay?” He whispers into Steve’s ear.

“Of course.” He heads up the hangar door and starts placing his gear next to the seats.

“Now, for you…” Bucky pulls you into his chest, wrapping his arms around your waist. Smiling, you place your arms around his shoulders. You hated leaving him for missions, but you loved seeing this side of him. He was so shy at times, not being able to express his feelings to you, or to be able to tell you what he was really thinking. This was never the case during his send offs. This was the time that his brain went into full panic, and he can’t help but to let every emotion that he has for you burst from his mouth, scared that he will never be able to tell you again if something should happen to you.

Staring into your eyes, you can see his panic, his fear, but mostly his love for you. “Come back to me, okay? I can’t do this without you. You’re my world, and if you’re not in it, I can’t be either. I need you to be safe…please.”

“I will, I promise. I need you, just as much as you need me.” 

“Debatable.” He cups your cheek, leans in, and places a small kiss on your forehead, before kissing your cheeks, and your nose.

“You have no idea how much you mean to me, do you James Buchanan Barnes?”

“You can tell when you get back, Doll,”

“Deal.” You smile as he kisses your lips, so gently, but so intensely, it almost makes you stay home.

“Okay, but listen, I have something important to say, and I need you to be serious for a minute.” He straightens up, requesting your full attention. “It’s really cold where you’re going, and the electricity there is shotty as hell. It comes and goes, which makes for a horrible night. I packed extra blankets and clothes for all of you, just in case. The hotel that you’re going to is shitty at best, and they probably won’t have heat. There is probably going to be a moment that you both find yourself tired, freezing, and most likely miserable. When that happens, I need you to do one thing for me…” 

“Okay…” You furrow your brows, curious, and equally confused as to where this is going.

“Don’t sleep with Steve.” You burst out laughing, and you can hear Steve almost choke in the plane.

“Bucky!” Steve yells down from the jet.

“I’m fucking serious. This isn’t one of those romantic movies, where you both find yourselves alone and cold, scared, with only one bed in the room. This is real life, and I swear I’ll be so mad at you two if you hook up behind my back.” 

Okay, at least he was trying to attempt to make the situation light. At this point you were crying from laughing, and you honestly couldn’t even fathom the thought of you ever being with anyone but him.

“Bucky…” You say, drawing out his name, rubbing your thumb along his cheek. You notice he starts to blush a bit, before closing his eyes, rubbing into your hand.

“Don’t break my heart, okay baby?” The smile that he gives you is pure adoration.

“I would never.” You gaze deep into his eyes, praying that he can see that he truly means the absolute world to you, and that you would die yourself before you would ever bring pain to those deep blues.

He leans into for one last kiss. “I love you. I don’t say it enough, but I need you to know that I do.”

“You don’t have to say it, but I like when you do.” You pull his face to your neck, wrapping your arm around him, placing one hand in his hair holding his head tightly to you. “I love you too, James. I’ll be home soon, I promise.”

Letting each other go was the hardest thing that you ever had to do. Sam had been waiting to approach you guys, letting you enjoy your time together, knowing that coming home was never a guarantee for any of you. He pats Bucky on the back, wanting to say goodbye. Bucky turns to give him a hug, telling him to be safe, and to watch out for each other. Those two loved to play bicker, but they were like brothers. Bucky worried as much for him as you and Steve.

“Be safe, Sammy.” Bucky hit his shoulder while doing a sneaky once over on Sam’s suit, making sure he was good to go, and that he had Redwing in place.

“Always. Hey, just one question though, before we leave.”

“Yeah, what’s up?” Bucky waits patiently.

“Is it okay if I sleep with Steve?” Covering your mouth with both hands, you break into a laughing fit again.   
“Would you two get on the plane already!” Steve yells from the cockpit.

“What? I don’t want to be cold either!” He yells in Steve’s direction. “Just because she’s not allowed doesn’t mean I can’t get a little Cap lovin’! Am I right?”

“He’s all yours. Go get him Sammy!” Bucky pushed him towards the jet, laughing, knowing that Steve was dying inside. “What?” He watches you shaking your head at him, and he feigns innocence.

“Don’t encourage him.” He rubs his nose against yours before giving you a quick peck. 

“Go.” He nods off in the directions of the jet, but not before giving you a playful smack on your butt.

“Ow!” You can’t help but turn red as you smile back at him, and he winks.

“Don’t forget about me!” He shouts towards you as you climb the ramp towards your seat.

“Oh, don’t worry, she ain’t touching my man! Sam does not share!” You drop your head into the seat, laughing with your eyes closed, shaking your head. This was going to be awesome.

“Alright, Alright!” Steve yells back towards the back of the plane. “We’re leaving now. Everyone say bye to Bucky…Jerk.” You give a final wave and a wink as you watch him disappear behind the door.

 

Which brings you back to today…

“I know, I know. I promised.” Steve doesn’t want to hear it. “I was a bit busy at the time, Buck.” 

“Busy not watching her almost die?” Tension was high at the moment, and you knew you had to step in before the hard blows started happening.

“Bucky, enough. He had three guys on him at once. He got to me in time, he had it, Sam just happened to be closer.” You had placed your hands on both of their chests, trying to diffuse the room. “It’s not his fault, we were outnumbered. It happened really fast, with no time to react. I’m fine, we all made it back alive, so we’re good here. Right? We’re good here?”

“Yeah, I’m…I’m sorry, I’m tired, I didn’t sleep well when you guys were gone.” He rubs his eyes, letting out a sigh of frustration and relief, happy to have you all home, but irritated that you were hurt. “We’re fine.”

“If it makes you feel any better, I shot that guy right in the middle of his eyes. Just sayin’.” The three of you look over at Sam, who is on the edge of the hospital bed, swinging his legs back and forth like a five year old. He winks while making finger guns, clicking his tongue. 

“It was a great shot…” You hold up your hand to him, asking for a high five. 

“Uh-huh. I’m not falling for that again. You can high five yourself.” He shakes his head disapprovingly at you.

“Riiiight, that happened.” Nodding your head in agreement, remembering the pain from earlier as his hand slammed into yours. “More importantly…” You smile at them all, attempting to change the subject, “No one slept with Steve.” 

“I feel as if that is supposed to make this better, but now I just feel sad and lonely…so thanks, for that.” Steve slams down into the chair next to your hospital bed, looking defeated. 

“Sorry, Steve. Maybe we should get going, the pain meds are starting to kick in, and I feel a little funny.” Holding your hand out to Bucky, asking for assistance, you scoot off the table, waiting for Bruce to give you’re your instructions.

“Try to keep her awake for a while. Feed her if she’ll eat. Make sure she gets her meds. Ice her head. Fingers dry. Got it.”

“Got it.” All three boys sound in unison. Bucky frowns at the two of them, as they both apologize. 

“You meant him, yeah, I’m going to go home. I need some sleep.” Steve wearlily rises from his chair before patting you leg with his hand. “Call me if you guys need anything. Feel better.”

“Thanks, Steve.” 

Sam gets off of his bed, and heads toward the door, but not before stopping next to you, rubbing your back for a second, pecking your head. “Eat with those meds so you don’t get sick. You’re going to have a wicked headache in the morning, the last thing you need is to be nauseous on top of it.” 

You salute him with your broken fingers, and give him a firm nod. “Night, Sammy.”

“Thank you, for…” Bucky nods your way, and Sam pulls him in for a hug. 

“It was my pleasure.” You smile, watching Sam leave with a slight limp.

“Now what?” You ask, holding your wrapped fingers, and an ice pack.

“We go home, and you let me take care of you.”

Bucky had been your personal angel that night. You couldn’t help but think what a great dad he would make if he were ever to have children. That was a conversation that had never been brought up before, and probably would never be, but the image of him coddling a young child made your heart happy, if only for a few minutes. 

“That feels so good.” Inhaling the delicious scent of apples, you close your eyes, and lean back into his hands. 

“Yeah? I’m honestly just trying to not get it caught in my hand.” Chuckling softly, he works his fingers through your hair, making sure to rub in the shampoo as best that he could without it getting in your eyes.

“You’re doing a great job. I may get hurt again, just so you can take care of me all the time.”

“How about I just do it once in awhile, and we skip the dramatics of almost dying for now on all together?” You can hear the smile in his voice, even if you couldn’t see it.

You were blissfully enjoying your bath, loving the attention that you were getting from Bucky, the two of you always finding comfort in each other, whenever you were together. There was something about Bucky that always put you at ease. Even when he was tense, angry, or just at his absolute worst, he could still touch you, or smile at you for a second, and make all of your troubles disappear. You could always go to him in a time of need, and he to you. He would take care of you until the day he died, no questions asked. Bucky was right, he didn’t tell you that he loved you enough, but you didn’t need him to. He showed you in other ways, a simple smile, a gentle touch, a whisper of a kiss on your temple. There was nothing that the two of you wouldn’t do for each other. 

He continues to wash out your hair, rinsing when needed. You soap off what you can, but he helps with your back, scrubbing off the remnants of your mission. He wraps you in a towel as you stand from the tub, holding your hand so you don’t slip. He tugs on your pajamas, making sure to not hit your fingers. He brushes out your hair, drying it so you don’t soak through your shirt. Kissing his nose, thanking him for the all of the care he has given you, you squeal as he lifts you up, bridal style, carrying you to your bed. Tucking you in, he places a chaste kiss on the top of your head.

“I’ll be right back.” You watch as he heads out of the room to your joint kitchen. You can hear bowls clunking together, the silverware rattle in the drawer, and the freezer being opened multiple times. You see his shadow travel down the hall, and recognize the distinct squeak of your linen closet door being opened and shut.

“Bucky, what is all this?” Laughing a little, you watch as he wraps an ice pack in a towel, before placing a bowl of your favorite ice cream in your lap. He of course, had brought his own bowl too, but he makes sure that you’re comfortable first before digging into his own. He props your pillow up, having you lean back onto the ice pack. 

“Are you comfortable, babe?” He grips the covers, bringing them up to cover your chest, making sure that you don’t get to cold. 

“I’m good.” What did you do to deserve this boy? Your heart beats a little faster, as he leans back against the headboard, but close enough to snuggle into you. He picks up your bowl in his metal hand, placing it in his palm, almost making it into a makeshift table of sorts for you. He hands you your spoon, before leaning back again, taking control of the remote, flipping through various channels until you decide on a comedy movie. 

“What?” He questions with a confused look on his face, sensing you watching him in his peripherals. 

“Are you going to sit there and hold my bowl until I’m done?” You smirk, thinking that he couldn’t have possibly thought this plan through.

“Yeah, you can’t hold it with your cast. I’ll hold it for you.” You giggle as he starts to blush a little. “Would you stop looking at me like that, and just eat. It’s gonna melt, doll.”

“Bucky Barnes, you are the cutest thing I have ever seen, you know that right?”

“Come on, stop it babe, you’re making me nervous. Eat already, so you can take your meds and we can go to sleep.” His shy and embarrassed smile was one of your favorites. You loved the way his cheeks would blush, and how the sides of his lips would crinkle. He could barely look at you without getting flustered. 

“Okay, okay.” A few minutes later you finish up, and he drops the dishes in the sink. He finds that you had pulled up the covers to your neck, and you had started to snuggle in to your pillows.

“You’re shivering.” He heads towards the end of the bed, grabbing an extra throw blanket, and drapes it over you. “Better?” He leans into you, covering you up to your shoulders in blankets. “Get some sleep. I’m going to text Bruce really quick. I’ll be back.”

You grab at his arms, pulling him back towards the bed.

“Stay with me tonight?” You almost beg.

It wasn’t often that you asked him to sleep in your bed, or vice versa. Truth be told, if it were up to you, you would sleep with him every night. The warmth and comfort that he brought you was unmatched. Sleeping next to him was like napping in the sunshine, his skin radiating just enough heat to keep you deep in your slumber. 

He rarely asked you, embarrassed and terrified that his nightmares would ruin you, or that he would somehow hurt you during them. You always thought this reasoning to be a little funny, being that he always slept best when you were with him. He’s never shared with you the few times that he’s woken up in pure panic, praying it wasn’t you that he was choking, instead of the Hydra scum in his nightmare, or that it wasn’t your angelic face that he had destroyed in real life, instead of the gruesome scene that had played out in his head. 

He could never comprehend why someone like you would want to sleep with him. Who in their right mind would want the cold, harsh texture of metal against their baby soft skin? Who would want a damaged man, holding them for comfort, when in reality, you being there put you in more danger than anyone else? Little did he know that it was in his arms, those strong, stubborn, protective arms, that you felt the most safe. It’s the closest place to his heart and soul, and you would live there if you could. If only he would let you.

“Of course. I’m not going to leave you tonight. Don’t worry.” He pulls your hand to his lips, kissing the back of your fingers. “Let me call him real quick, and then I’ll change.”

You release his hand, missing his touch and scent already. Slowly, your eyelids feel like heavy weights, and you fight with all you can in you to keep them open, waiting for his return. 

He leans against the doorway for a few minutes, watching you sleep, wondering how you could be so perfect. He scans his memory, trying to pinpoint a place, a time, a good deed, or something of value that he had contributed to the world that would make the gods think that he was worthy of your presence. He finds nothing, and settles on the fact that maybe you were his gift, a reward for all of the horrible things that were done to him. He hated to think of you that way. No one should be rewarded for doing the gruesome things that he had done. Maybe, just maybe, you were sent to him to be his light, to guide him through his darkness, to help him find a way out, to fill his heart with love again. 

Slipping in next to you, he slides under the covers, trying not to disturb you. He’s so tense, and he never knows where to put his hands. Thankfully, you never give him the opportunity to let his awkwardness take over. You roll to your side, and push your back against his chest. You hear him breath, as if he wants to complain, and talk you out of it, but instead, you grab his arm, and tuck it into your waist. He tries to fight against it, but you hold it in place. He was stubborn, but you were worse.

“Stop.” You hear him release his breath, annoyed that you’re struggling back against him.

“Babe…”

“I want you here…right here. I feel safe with you…just like this. I need you here, now Buck, just like this…please.”

He doesn’t say a word. He can’t say a word, because deep down, he needs you too, just like this. He can’t protect you out there all the time, but for as long as he is awake, he can protect you here, even if’ it’s only for a few minutes, until his past comes back for more of his soul. 

“Ughhh…whhyy?” The pounding in your head was relentless. Rubbing around the knot on your skin was pointless, as the pain was becoming more aggressive as the minutes past. “Take two every eight to twelve hours.” You read in your head the amber vials instructions, squinting as the brightness of your phone’s flashlight pierces through your eyes, doubling the misery. The taste of the water, not nearly flavorful, or thick enough to hide the sandy coating of the dry pills, almost makes you gag. 

Small sounds from behind you make you smirk, turn, and gaze upon the innocent form next to you. Bucky sleeping, truly sleeping was a sight to see. The mess of his hair, the small stubble of his chin pulling against the pillowcase, and the worry lines disappearing from his eyes was a beautiful view, and one that you were lucky enough to be able to witness first hand. Moving slowly, but with purpose, you lift the covers, and slink down next to him, praying that he wouldn’t wake up, but alas, no one could rival the “alertness at all times for potential danger” like Bucky could, especially when he knew you were next to him. 

“What’s wrong, you okay?” Immediately scanning your body and the room for danger, he calms when he realizes that the area was safe, and that you in fact, were simply just shifting in bed. 

“I’m fine, my head hurts, that’s all.” You respond, slowing rolling him over onto his back, pulling the covers up over you again.

“I’ll get the ice pack and your pills.” His voice is so adorable when he first wakes up. It’s scratchy and soft, and it makes you want to cuddle and protect him, all the while wanting him to roll you over and take you right then and there. 

“I already took my meds, I just want to go back to sleep. Lay back down.” You barely speak above a whisper to him, the both of you trying to remain quiet, teetering on the fine line of either falling back asleep, or giving up hope and finding yourself wide awake. 

You wrap your arm around his side, firmly holding his ribs, pulling yourself as close to him as you can. While inhaling the sweet smell of his body, your fingertips dance along his glowing skin. You moan a sigh of happiness as your cheek rests upon his chest, the sound of his heartbeat lulling you almost to sleep instantly. He tenses as you pull his left arm over you, even more so as you open his hand, and place his metal palm over the ever growing bump on your head. Sweet relief his hand brings to you, the cool feel of the metal against your head providing almost instant pain relief. You can feel him start to resist you once again.

“Bucky, stop being dumb, leave it.” He holds it to your bruised head for a minute, fighting with himself, the voice in his head screaming that he shouldn’t be this close to you while you were sleeping, and there is no way that he should be holding your head with a weapon.

“Doll, I…I don’t think that’s a good…” He stops as he hears the soft moans, and whimpers from you. It had taken you no time at all to fall asleep. The mixture of his beating heart and heated torso, making for the perfect storm, pulling you into his heavenly atmosphere. He loved to watch you sleep. You were so innocent, so pure, and he was certain that one day he would wake up, and realize that this was all a dream, that you were never really here, and never really his.

“I love you, Y/N.” He whispers your way, hoping to hear a confirmation that you were still his, still real, in his arms, holding onto him. He hears nothing, only the smallest of snores, letting him know that you were in another place than him. It’s then that he realizes that he doesn’t ever want this to end, there is no world without you in it, at least not for him.

He rubs his hand through your hair, seeing the smallest smirk, the smirk of someone who was dreaming of something vivid, and spectacular, and safe. He turns his head, kissing your hair, thanking the gods once again for your existence just one more time, before whispering down to you.

“I’m going to marry you one day.”


End file.
